


Tempest Communication Network

by FazedMuttley



Series: Andromedrabbles. [1]
Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-05
Updated: 2018-07-11
Packaged: 2018-10-28 12:58:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 6,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10831758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FazedMuttley/pseuds/FazedMuttley
Summary: SAM opens a Communication Network for text based chat. Team Tempest use it more than they probably should. (Note: Any Hyperlinks in the chat cam be followed)





	1. TCN

Running Security Protocol:

Scanned: 8976556/8976556 Items.

Running Secondary Diagnostic:

Systems Operating At Peak Efficiency.

Calibrating AI Core

Connecting to SAM Node:

Secure Link Established, **Ark Hyperion** , Please allow the Pathfinder **[A.S Ryder]** to enter their authorisation code:

***************

Confirmed: Access Granted. Running Designated Operation:

Creating up **[Tempest Communication Network]**...

 **[Simulated Adaptive Matrix]** added to **Tempest Communication Network**.

 **[Simulated Adaptive Matrix]** renamed **[SAM]**.

Updating Crew Roster following **[Priority: Eos]**

 **[SAM]** added **[Group: Pathfinder_Team], [Group: Tempest_Crew]** to **Tempest Communication Network**.

 **[SAM]** signing in **[All Users]**.

 

 **Tempest Communication Network** Online...

 

 **[SAM]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network, Please use responsibly.

 **[Pelessaria]:** Cool!

 **[Pelessaria]:** Nope! Not happening!

 

 **[Pelessaria]** renamed **[Peebee]**

**[Liam]:** Not even a minute! Gil you owe me fifty credits.

 **[Gil]:** Damn it! I knew you would change your name Peebee, but did you have to do it so soon!

 **[Suvi]:** Aww, not happy Gil?

 **[Drack]:** Ha!

 **[Gil]:** I regret making the bet already. However it did give me an idea.

 

 **[Gil]**  renamed **[Poker Face].**

**[Poker Face]:** So what shall we change the others too?

 **[SAM]:** Please refrain from names that could be taken with some offence.

 **[Poker Face]:** Don’t worry SAM! I’m a good boy.

 **[Vetra]:** Yeah, whatever you say Gil. JaJaJa!

 **[Poker Face]:** ...

 **[Sara]:** This is why you wanted my authorisation SAM? This is a great idea.  ^_^

 **[SAM]:** That is correct, Sara.

 **[Peebee]:** Hey Ryder! What does the A in your name stand for?

 **[Sara]:** Nothing it’s just a letter.

 **[Poker Face]:** That’s a bluff. Peebee, new game. Find out what it is.

**[Sara]: SAM don’t let them find out!**

**[Peebee]:** Oooooh! Bold text! Sara’s getting scared! This is gonna be fun!

 **[Vetra]:** This is going to end badly. I just know it. JaJaJa!

 

 **[Vetra]** renamed **[Bootlegger].**

**[Bootlegger]:** I approve! So Gil, what are your ideas for the others?

 

 **[Suvi]** renamed **[I <3 Rocks].**

**[Kallo]:** I find that this one fits.

 **[Poker Face]:** More to come.

 

 **[Kallo]** renamed **[Flyboy].**

**[Flyboy]:** Wouldn’t pilot be better?

 **[Poker Face]:** Same thing...

 **[I <3 Rockcs]: **I find the names humorous.

 **[Peebee]:** This is fun. Wonder who’s next? Ha!

 **[Poker Face]:** Still working on it.

 **[Drack]:** That is brilliant! HaHa!

 **[Sara]:** I changed my mind. This was a bad idea.

 

 **[Drack]** renamed **[Old Man].**

 **[Lexi]** renamed **[Golden Rose].**

 **[Liam]** renamed **[Coffee Bean].**

**[Poker Face]:** Only a few left. ^_-

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Seriously a coffee joke? We left those cafes back in the Milky Way!

 **[Poker Face]:** We all know Costa did the best coffee, you should be proud to share the name even if you spelt it wrong!

 **[Coffee Bean]:** This is true.

 

 **[Cora]** renamed **[Green Thumb]**

 

 **[Green Thumb]:** I approve.

 

 **[Poker Face]:** One left! ^_^

 **[Sara]:** Oh god! Leave me alone.

 **[Peebee]:** This is gonna be funny, I just know it!

 

 **[Sara]** renamed **[Tiny]**

**[Tiny]:** What? Hey!

 **[Bootlegger]:** That’s perfect! JaJaJa!

 **[Golden Rose]:** Perhaps leave her height out of it?

 **[Poker Face]:** I can change it. If she tells us what the A in her name means. ^_^

 **[Tiny]:** O_o

 **[Tiny]:** No!

 **[Tiny]:** I can’t change it myself! It’s asking for a password!

 **[Poker Face]:** Oops...

**[Peebee]: Ha!**

**[Tiny]** logged out.

 

 **[SAM]:** The Pathfinder appears to have head butted her desk. Perhaps I should change her name back.

 **[Poker Face]:** Don’t do that SAM. It’s only a bit of fun.

 **[SAM]:** I shall continue to monitor the Pathfinder. I reserve the right to amend the name should it cause her distress.

 **[Old Man]:** AIs will never have a sense of humor.

 **[SAM]:** What is green with red toenails?

 **[Peebee]:** What? :D

 **[SAM]:** A Krogan masquerading as a Cherry Tree.

 **[Old Man]:** Okay, for an AI that was pretty good.

 **[Poker Face]:** Ha!

 **[Bootlegger]:** Funny. But I’ve got to go Sid is calling.

 

 **[Bootlegger]** logged out.

**[Peebee]:** This chat was the best idea ever!


	2. Fighting Boredom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Team Tempest discover private chat within TCN. Also Peebee gets bored.

**Tempest Communication Network** Online...

 

 **[Automated Message]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network. Please use responsibly.

 

 **[Green Thumb]:** Fire drill update. Everyone made it except for Peebee. Also posted this on the notice board.

**[Peebee]** signed in.

**[Peebee]: AS I SAID ON THE NOTICE BOARD!**

**[Peebee]: I. LIVE. IN. AN. ESCAPE. POD!**

**[Tiny]** signed in.

**[Tiny]:** That is a fair point. Peebee does live in an escape pod.

 **[Peebee]:** Thank you!

 

 **[Bootlegger]** signed in.

 

 **[Bootlegger]:** That was a Fire Drill? I just saw people gathered and though something fun was happening.

 **[Green Thumb]:** Really? I announced it over the intercom. It was hard enough getting Kallo to even let me touch the comm... Oh you are joking...

 **[Tiny]:** Kallo does love the Tempest.

 **[Peebee]:** Love is one word for it. I prefer obsessed!

 **[Bootlegger]:** Says the one addicted to Remnant Tech.

 

 **[Poker Face]** signed in.

 

 **[Poker Face]:** On that note. Ryder I want to make a few changes to the drive core.

 

 **[Flyboy]** signed in.

 

 **[Flyboy]:** The Tempest is perfect as she is.

 **[Poker Face]:** She was perfect for back home. We are in new space now!

 **[Peebee]:** [[Human-eating-popcorn.gif]](http://gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/Maurice-Moss-Eating-Popcorn-The-IT-Crowd.gif)

 **[Bootlegger]:** Ja! Here we go...

 **[Tiny]:** Seriously? Again?

 **[Poker Face]:** I’m making a private group...

 

 **[Poker Face]** created a private group **[Tempest Tantrums].**

 **[Poker Face]** invited **[Flyboy]** to **[Tempest Tantrums].**

 **[Flyboy]** joined **[Tempest Tantrums].**

 **[Poker Face]** entered **[Tempest Tantrums]** private chat.

 **[Flyboy]** entered **[Tempest Tantrums]** private chat.

 

 **[Tiny]:** That escalated quickly.

 **[Peebee]:** Bored now!

 

 **[Coffee Bean]** signed in.

 

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Ok. Let’s play a game. It’s a seven letter word meaning static and expressionless.

 **[Tiny]:** Addison!

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Got it in one! xD

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Your turn.

 **[Tiny]:** Nine letter word meaning ‘Forerunner’.

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Really? Where’s the fun in that one?

 **[Peebee]:** Eos Colony

 **[Bootlegger]:** Prodromos.

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Prodromos!

 **[Coffee Bean]:**  Damn! Challenge Accepted. Vetra it’s your turn.

 **[Peebee]:** Hey! I was first!

 **[Tiny]:** You gave two words.

 **[Peebee]:** This game is stupid!

 **[Bootlegger]:** Three letter word, that is in a way my profession, but not. However it is still closely related to me, albeit not in the correct sense.

 **[Peebee]:** Ass. Works on so many levels.

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Huh?

 **[Tiny]:** Nyx.

 **[Bootlegger]:** Point goes to Ryder.

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Ah Smuggler, you technically steal things. Clever.

 **[Peebee]:** My answer was the best.

 **[Tiny]:** Seven letter word. I contain minerals, one of which is made up of both calcium and sodium.

 **[Peebee]:** Yawn!

**[I <3 Rocks] **signed in.

 **[Green Thumb]** is inactive.

 

 **[I <3 Rocks]: **Granite.

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Trust you to get the rock one.

 **[Bootlegger]:** It’s science Liam. She is a scientist, just because it happened to be a rock, doesn’t mean that’s why she got it correct.

 **[I <3 Rocks]: **It might have a little to do with rocks.

 **[Tiny]:** Your turn Suvi.

 **[Suvi]:** Oh my turn? Lets see.

 **[Suvi]:** Four letter word for an understanding of anatomy, aliens and how biology works.

 

 **[Golden Rose]** signed in.

 

 **[Golden Rose]:** That would be me.

 **[Tiny]:** I thought it was me. ¬_¬

 **[Golden Rose]:** It is my turn I believe. Three letter word. Where you should be at the moment.

 **[Peebee]:** Isp.

 **[Golden Rose]:** Do I even want to know?

 **[Peebee]:** In Sara’s Pants!. :D

 **[Tiny]:** Uhm.... Night all!

 

 **[Tiny]** signed out.

 

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Oh God...

 **[Bootlegger]:** Peebee...

 

 **[Poker Face]** joined **[Tempest Communication Network]** chat.

 

 **[Poker Face]:** Wow, I missed alot!

 **[Peebee]:** Have fun with Kallo?

 **[Poker Face]:** Not really. But the point is mine. Bed, and that’s where I’m heading, Night folks.

 

 **[Poker Face]** signed out.

 

 **[Golden Rose]:** I suggest you follow Gil. It is very late. Vetra, please come by the medbay in the morning.

 

 **[Golden Rose]** signed out.

 

 **[Bootlegger]:** Okay, Goodnight all, it appears I have a visitor.

 **[Peebee]:** Who?

 **[Bootlegger]:** Four letter word. The height difference is substantial.

 

 **[Bootlegger]** signed out.

**[Peebee]:** Hmm...

 

 **[Poker Face]** signed in.

 

 **[Poker Face]:** Peebee is thinking what I’m thinking.

 **[Coffee Bean]:** I might be thinking the same thing.

 

 **[Coffee Bean]** created a private group **[Sara Smiles].**

**[Poker Face]:** That’s perfect! ^_^

**[Coffee Bean]** invited **[Poker Face]** to **[Sara Smiles].**

 **[Coffee Bean]** invited **[Peebee]** to **[Sara Smiles].**

 **[Poker Face]** joined **[Sara Smiles].**

 **[Peebee]** joined **[Sara Smiles].**

 **[Poker Face]** entered **[Sara Smiles]** private chat.

 **[Coffee Bean]** entered **[Sara Smiles]** private chat.

 **[Peebee]** entered **[Sara Smiles]** private chat.

 

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Coffee Bean]:** So Gil, you want to do the honours?

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Poker Face]:** Of course! Betting pool is open. Who’s putting money on Sara and Vetra becoming a couple!

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Peebee]:** Hey, You know I want in on this but whats with the name?

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Coffee Bean]:** [[Nexus_Audiobank_HCM_X012987734]](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v639MzJa7tQ)

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Peebee]:** Ha!

 **[I <3 Rocks]: **What’s happening? A new group?

 

 **[Poker Face]** invited **[I <3 Rocks] **to **[Sara Smiles]**.

 **[I <3 Rocks]** joined **[Sara Smiles].**

 **[I <3 Rocks] **entered **[Sara Smiles]** private chat.

**[@Sara Smiles] – [I <3 Rocks]: **One second the chat is updating.

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [I <3 Rocks]: **Oh! 100 credits!

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Poker Face]:** This is going to be so much fun. In the morning, I am getting everyone in here.

 

 **[Tiny]** signed in.

 

 **[Tiny]:** Why is there a Private Chat about me smiling?

 

 **[I <3 Rocks] **joined **[Tempest Communication Network]** chat.

 **[Poker Face]** joined **[Tempest Communication Network]** chat.

 **[Coffee Bean]** joined **[Tempest Communication Network]** chat.

 

 **[Poker Face]:** No Reason! We were just discussing how awesome our Pathfinder is!

 **[I <3 Rocks]: **Yeah, It’s a fan thread. :-)

 **[Coffee Bean]:** It’s nothing bad Sara. Honest.

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Peebee]:** Lol as if she will believe that! :D

 **[Tiny]:** Ok... Well if I get worried, I’ll just have SAM pull the logs.

 

 **[Tiny]** signed out.

 **[Poker Face]** invited **[SAM** **]** to **[Sara Smiles]**

 **[SAM]** joined **[Sara Smiles]**.

 **[SAM]** entered **[Sara Smiles]** private chat.

 

 **[@Sara Smiles] –[SAM]:** I see no harm in this conversation. Would you like an algorithm to keep track of the numbers and calculations?

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Peebee]:** Best. AI. EVER!

 

 

 


	3. A Ball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peebee 'finds' a ball.

**Tempest Communication Network** Online...

 

 **[Automated Message]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network. Please use responsibly.

 

 **[Tiny]** signed in.

 

 **[Tiny]:** What is that noise?

 **[Tiny]:** Some of us are trying to sleep!

 

 **[Coffee Bean]** signed in.

 

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Peebee found a ball.

 **[Tiny]:** A ball?

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Yup, a pink rubber ball.

 **[Tiny]:** How have you not killed her yet?

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Oh, I left ages ago. I’m back on the Tempest.

 

 **[Bootlegger]** signed in.

 

 **[Bootlegger]:** You left me and Sara?? TRAITOR!!

 **[Coffee Bean]:** She kept throwing it at me and then giggling like it was the funniest thing ever.

 **[Tiny]:** It’s called taking one for the team, Kosta!

 

 **[Poker Face]** signed in.

 

 **[Poker Face]:** Well this is more exciting that drive core maintenance.

 **[Coffee Bean]:** It’s not my fault she stole a ball! Why blame me?

 **[Tiny]:** It was your idea to bunk up in Prodromos! So entirely your fau... wait she stole it?

 **[Coffee Bean]:** Yeah it was in one of the storage rooms, you know for the colony kids? Well when there are colony kids.

 **[Tiny]:** Thanks Liam! ^_^

 

 **[Peebee]** renamed **[Sly Cooper]**

**[Poker Face]: OMG! xD**

**[Coffee Bean]:** LOL

 

 **[Sly Cooper]** signed in.

 

 **[Sly Cooper]:** What the hell!?!

 **[Poker Face]:** Idea!

 **[Old Man]** renamed **[Murray]**

 **[Poker Face]** renamed **[Bentley]**

**[Tiny]:** Really Gil? -_-

 **[Bentley]:** Why not the whole gang?

 

 **[Murray]** signed in.

 

 **[Murray]:** I just used Nexus-Net. I am NOT a pink Hippopotamus.

 **[Tiny]:** LMAO!

 **[Coffee Bean]:** I’m Crying! xD

 **[Sly Cooper]:** Change my name back Ryder!

 **[Tiny]:** Stop throwing the ball at the wall so Vetra and I can sleep and I will.

 **[Sly Cooper]:** Fine...

 

 **[Sly Cooper]** renamed **[Peebs]**

 **[Peebs]** renamed **[Pelessaria]**

 

**[Pelessaria]: OI! STOP IT!**

**[Bootlegger]:** You threw the ball again.

 **[Pelessaria]:** Fine I’ll go play outside!

 **[Bentley]:** That makes you sound like a kid.

 **[Murray]:** You’re all kids to me. Ha!

 

 **[Pelessaria]** is idle.

 **[Flyboy]** signed in.

 

 **[Flyboy]:**  I can see her playing catch with herself. She is using her jump jet.

 **[Tiny]:** That’s kind of sad. :(

 

 **[I <3 Rocks] **signed in.

 **[Pelessaria]** renamed **[Rocket Raccoon]**

**[Bentley]** That’s my girl Suvi!

 **[Bootlegger]:** I think Sara could die if she continues laughing so hard.

 **[SAM]:** Do not worry Miss Nyx. I will regulate the Pathfinders breathing, she will come to no harm.

 **[Bootlegger]** : It just an expression SAM. It is meant to express humour.

 **[SAM]:** I see. Thank you Miss Nyx. Adding to logic database.

 

 **[Rocket Racoon]** is no longer idle.

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** I AM NOT A RACOON!

 **[Tiny]:** You sure?

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** Don’t make me hurt you!

 **[Bootlegger]:** You have the mask on all the time and a penchant for stealing.

**[Rocket Racoon]: NOT. A. RACOON!**

**[Tiny]:** Okay.

 **[Tiny]:** On a slightly related note. If you smack a racoon in the face with a glove as if you were challenging it to a duel, your chances of getting rabies from racoon related injuries goes up dramatically.

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** I do not have rabies!

 **[Tiny]:** I know, you literally just said you aren’t a raco... wait! Is this your confession that you are in fact a racoon? ^_^

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** I hate you sometimes...


	4. Names.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We find out Saras first name.

**Tempest Communication Network** Online...

 

 **[Automated Message]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network. Please use responsibly.

 

 **[Tiny]** signed in.

 

**[Tiny]: SCOTT IS AWAKE!!!**

**[Tiny]:** SAM is setting up his IDs.

                            

 **[Bootlegger]** signed in.

 

 **[Bootlegger]:** So we finally get to meet the infamous Scott Ryder?

 **[Tiny]:** Better than that V! He’s joining the crew!

 

 **[SAM]** added **[Scott]** to **[Tempest Communication Network]**

 **[Scott]** signed in.

 

 **[Scott]:** Hi People.

 **[Tiny]:** Scotty! Hi Bro!!!

 **[Scott]:** Sis, your name! :-)

 

 **[Scott]** renamed **[Baby Bro]**

**[Baby Bro]:** Really Andi?

 **[Tiny]:** **NO! BRO HOW COULD YOU!!**

 **[Baby Bro]:** Shit! Sorry Andi.

**[Tiny]: ...**

**[Baby Bro]:** Oh Fuck...

 

 **[Rocket Racoon]** signed in.

 **[Bentley]** signed in.

 

 **[Tiny]:** Oh no...

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** Hi Andi!

 **[Bentley]:** Scott, you have to tell us what its short for!

 **[Baby Bro]:** I don’t think I should...

 **[Tiny]:** Don’t you dare!

 **[Bootlegger]:** It cannot be that bad can it?

 **[Baby Bro]:** It can be...

 **[Tiny]:** Scott if you utter one more word I will make your life a living hell!

 **[SAM]:** Prediction algorithms indicate that prolonged conversations in relation to this topic will cause the Pathfinder unwarranted stress. Therefore the Pathfinder is: _Andromeda Sara Ryder._

**[Tiny]: SAM!**

**[Rocket Racoon]: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**

**[Bentley]:** Not as bad as I thought it would be.

 **[Tiny]:** Kill me now...

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** Hey Vetra, you up for heading to Eos?

 **[Bootlegger]:** Why?

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** To continue conquering _Andromeda._

**[Tiny]** signed out.

 

 **[Bootlegger]:** Way to go Peebee...

 **[Bentley]:** Ah, now I see why she dislikes it.

 **[Baby Bro]:** Yeah, the conversations pre-launch were... complicated.

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** This is brilliant.

 

 **[I <3 Rocks]** signed in.

 

 **[I <3 Rocks]: **Sara just left the ship.

 **[Baby Bro]:** What? Fuck! Can someone go talk to her? I’m with Lexi.

 **[Bootlegger]:** I’ll go.

 

 **[Bootlegger]** signed out.

 **[Tiny]** renamed **[Andromeda]**

**[Bentley]:** Peebee... Did you change the password?

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** Ha!

 **[Bentley]:** To think I’m the one being sensible here.

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** Scotty! Whats your given name?

 **[Baby Bro]:** Sebastian, Why?

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** Boring!

 

 **[Bootlegger]** signed in.

 **[Andromeda]** signed in.

 

 **[Andromeda]:** Why?... I hate my name so much!

 

 **[Andromeda]** signed out.

 

 **[Bootlegger]:** Peebee, I suggest you hide.

 **[Baby Bro]:** Yeah, Andi has a temper.

 **[Bentley]:** She just walked past the Nomad, if it were a cartoon, there would be steam coming from her ears!

 **[I** **< 3 Rocks]:** She found Peebee.

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** d nfnlonvwjefenv efjewfbugugbjwl gpgv

 **[Bentley]:** That doesn’t look good.

 **[Baby Bro]:** That’s Andi for you! She has a temper.

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** aknknioenfnokdnvlkebflzhgdvdb  jcbjdlbv esvlz

 **[I <3 Rocks]:** Peebee just tried to escape and got dragged back inside the escape pod. There were a few curses and some biting.

 **[Rocket Racoon]:** Im going to have a black eye!

 **[Bentley]:** So you’re a blue Panda now?

 

 **[Rocket Racoon]** signed out.

 

 **[Baby Bro]:** I get the feeling this is going to be fun.

 **[SAM]:** I think the Pathfinder is unhappy with me. She has covered my node in her quarters and is ignoring me.

 **[Baby Bro]:** Don’t worry SAM she will come round.

 

 **[Baby Bro]** renamed **[Evil Brother]**

**[SAM]:** It was the Pathfinders instruction.

 **[Evil Brother]:** Andi come on! It’s not that bad.

 **[SAM]:** I do not think she is listening.


	5. Siblings?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sara gets annoyed at the constant name changing and things fall from there.

**Tempest Communication Network** Online...

 

 **Tempest Communication Network** in Maintenance Mode...

 **[SAM]** initiated **Automated Name Change.**

 **Automated Name Change** in progress.

Resetting **[All Users]** to default.

 **[Simulated Adaptive Matrix]** applying **[Pathfinder Alterations]**

 **[SAM]** Initiated **Tempest Communication Networks** restart process.

Updating Crew Roster following **[Priority: Aya]**

 

 **Tempest Communication Network** Online...

 

 **[Automated Message]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network. Please use responsibly.

 

 **[Sara]** signed in.

 

 **[Sara]:** Only I can change names now.

 

 **[Peebee]** signed in.

 

 **[Peebee]:** Well it was fun while it lasted!

 **[Peebee]:** At least I’m not a racoon anymore :D

 

 **[Scott]** signed in.

 

 **[Scott]:** You still mad Sis?

 **[Sara]:** Yes Little brother. I am.

 **[Scott]:** Well, I’ve been thinking.

 **[Sara]:** Not a good start to any conversation.

 **[Scott]:**...

 **[Scott]:** Anyway, Technically I am now the older twin.

 **[Sara]:** What?

 **[Scott]:** Well you went into Cryo about a week before I did.

 **[Sara]:** So?

 **[Scott]:** Even though I was in a coma, I was still only defrosted a few hours after you. Which means since you were frozen before I was, you stopped aging.

 **[Sara]:** No you are not taking this away from me.

 **[Scott]:** You can’t deny it.

 **[Sara]:** I hate you sometimes... Big Brother.

 **[Scott]:** No you don’t, you love me!

 

 **[Vetra]** signed in.

 **[Gil]** signed in.

 

 **[Gil]:** Aww, no more fun names.

 **[Vetra]:** I think more on point is the age question here, Gil.

 **[Gil]:** Scott is right though. If Sara stopped aging for a while it makes him older.

 **[Sara]:** Why is everybody so mean to me!!

 **[Vetra]:** I would take it as a compliment. You are now the younger twin.

 **[Sara]:** I suppose.

 **[Peebee]:** Baby Sara. *pinches cheeks* Isn’t she just adorable!

 

 **[Lexi]** signed in.

 

 **[Lexi]:** Sara, Medbay now.

 **[Sara]:** How did you?

 **[Lexi]:** SAM told me, now get to the Medbay.

 

 **[Sara]** signed out.

 **[Lexi]** signed out.

 

 **[Scott]:** What happened?

 **[SAM]:** The Pathfinder punched the wall, scans indicated that she fractured two fingers.

 **[Scott]:** She really needs to control her temper.

 

 **[Vetra]** is idle.

 

 **[Peebee]** entered **[Sara Smiles]** private chat.

 

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Peebee]:** Vetra is in the Medbay with Sara!

 

 **[Gil]** invited **[Scott]** to **[Sara Smiles]**

 **[Gil]** entered **[Sara Smiles]** private chat.

 **[Scott]** joined **[Sara Smiles]**

 **[Scott]** entered **[Sara Smiles]** private chat.

 

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Gil]:** Looks like all the signs are there, what about an insider’s opinion?

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Scott]:** Well I would guess that she does in fact like Vetra if that’s what you are asking. Chat is still loading all the previous posts.

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Scott]:** Wait Gil. Is that pot count accurate?

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Gil]:** Yup! Every credit.

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Scott]:** That’s over 15k....

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Gil]:** I know! Who would have thought it would get so high, we each keep chipping in, Peebee just added 250.

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Scott]:** So who gets the pot?

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Peebee]:** I say the one who made the most recent bet! If we are wrong we get our money back as SAM is keeping track of everything.

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Gil]:** Suvi thinks we should use it to get Vetra and Sara something nice if they are a couple.

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Scott]:** That’s a good idea.

**[Sara]** signed in.

 

 **[Sara]:** So, how’s that fan chat going Scott...

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Scott]:**  Uh, what the heck is she on about?

 **[Sara]:** One thing I know is that Scott would not be in a fan chat... he would do anything possible to mock me.

 **[@Sara Smiles]- [Peebee]:** Busted!

 

 **[Vetra]** is no longer idle.

 

 **[Vetra]:** Wait, I just looked at the list of users... everyone but me and Sara and Jaal are in it.

 **[Vetra]:** WAIT SID IS IN IT!!!!

 **[Sara]:** I get the feeling they are hiding things from us...

 **[Sara Smiles] – [Gil]:** SAM?

 **[SAM]:** The Sara Smiles chat group appears to contain facts and opinions on one Andromeda Ryder, also known as Sara.

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Peebee]:** Wait things are disappearing...

 **[SAM]:** This chat was marked as private and was kept separate from **[Tempest Commication Network]** to prevent embarrassment and any feelings of a similar nature.

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Scott]:** Is SAM rewriting the thread because these posts seem on point...

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Gil]:** Yup! Backup plan me and Suvi came up with. SAM is connected to everything so he can post anywhere!

 **[SAM]:** The fact that Vetra Nyx was excluded is an oversight on **[Gil]** s part. This well be rectified momentarily.

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [SAM]:** Please refrain from typing while the final amendments take place. Transferring **[Setra Ryx Poll]** and relevant data to SAM node.

 

 **[SAM]** invited **[Vetra]** to **[Sara Smiles]**

 **[SAM]** invited **[Sara]** to **[Sara Smiles]**

 **[Vetra]** joined **[Sara Smiles]**

 **[Vetra]** entered **[Sara Smiles]** private chat.

 **[Sara]** joined **[Sara Smiles]**

 **[Sara]** entered **[Sara Smiles]** private chat.

**[@Sara Smiles] – [Sara]:** I call bullshit! There is no way Scott would call me his awesome sister.

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Scott]:** Oh sorry! I meant... Awesome Younger Sister*

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Peebee]:** LOLS

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Sara]:** Scott... I will hurt you

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Scott]:** You have to find me first!! Ha! ^_^

 

 **[Scott]** signed out.

 **[Sara]** signed out.

 

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Gil]:** Am the only one who wants to watch this?

 **[@Sara Smiles] – [Vetra]** : I already went looking.

 

 **[Jaal]** signed in.

 

 **[Jaal]** : The Human know as Scott just ran past me, is it some form of human ritual to run from your siblings while yelling apologies?


	6. Hair?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaal has a query, if only it were so simple.

**Tempest Communication Network** Online...

 

 **[Automated Message]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network. Please use responsibly.

 

 **[Jaal]** signed in.

 

 **[Jaal]:** Why do humans possess this hair?

 **[Jaal]:** No other species from the Milky Way appears to have this.

 

 **[Peebee]** signed in

 

 **[Peebee]:** They came from monkeys!

 **[Jaal]:** What is a monkey? Is that some form of animal? Like the Pyjak?

 **[Peebee]:** Kinda, Lemme see.

**[Peebee]:** [ **[Nexus_Archive_Earth_Animals_Z089913]** ](http://www.venuequest.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/Monkey-with-banana.jpg)

**[Peebee]:** Isn’t it cute!

 **[Jaal]:** I have seen Sara eating a similar item.

 **[Peebee]:** It’s called a banana! They are awesome!

 **[Jaal]:** So Humans have developed so it is only on their head?

 **[Peebee]:** Well they have it in.... places.

 

 **[Scott]** signed in.

 

 **[Scott]:** Perhaps Peebee isn’t the best person to be talking about this with.

 

 **[Suvi]** signed in.

 

 **[Suvi]:** I agree.

 **[Peebee]:** Scottie! Hows Sara?

 **[Scott]:** Shes fine, why?

 **[Peebee]:** Well your her twin, does she you know?

 **[Scott]:** Really Peebee? I have no idea!

 **[Peebee]:** I bet she does! I mean she shaves the side of her head.

 

 **[Vetra]** signed in.

 

 **[Vetra]:** I always wondered why some humans have shorter hair, they cut it?

 **[Suvi]:** Yeah? You didn’t know?

 **[Vetra]:** I always assumed you malted like other earth  creatures.

 **[Scott]:** Peebee stop private messaging me pictures!

 **[Peebee]:** Not like girls Scottie? :P

 **[Scott]:** I do not mind them, I just prefer men.

 

 **[Sara]** signed in.

 

 **[Sara]:** PEEBEE! Why on earth are you having this conversation.

 **[Jaal]:** I vested an interest. It appears to have declined from there.

 **[Sara]:** Peebee, why are you sending me pictures of naked Turians?

 **[Vetra]:** Shes doing what? JaJaJa!

 **[Sara]:** I have to go...

 

 **[Sara]** signed out.

 **[Gil]** signed in.

 

 **[Gil]:** Two reasons to join this chat and I’ll only announce one! Ha!

 **[Gil]:** _Hello_ Scott.

 **[Scott]:** Uhm, Hi Gil?

 **[Gil]:** Give it a moment.

 **[Peebee]:** It must be genetic, both of them are oblivious.

 **[Vetra]:** Yeah...

 **[Suvi]:** Vetra?

 **[Vetra]:** Never mind, It is nothing.

 **[Scott]:** Genetic? What?

 **[Gil]:** Stop distracting my man!

 **[Scott]:** Your what?... Oh!

**[Sara]** signed in.

 

 **[Sara]:** Penny in the air.

 **[Scott]:** Uhm, Gil. You maybe want to grab a drink sometime?

 **[Gil]:** Why, Scott are you asking me on a date?

 **[Scott]:** Wasn’t that what you wanted.

 **[Sara]:** Penny Drops!

 **[Scott]:** Silence Sister!

 **[Sara]:** *pouts*

 **[Vetra]:** JaJaJa!

 **[Gil]:** That would be nice Scott. I accept.

 **[Scott]:** Thats great! ^_^

 **[Sara]:** Scotties blushing!!!

 **[Suvi]:** Why is it so silent now?

 **[Jaal]:** Scott is trying to get to Sara, who has locked herself in the Nomad. From her comments she appears to be teasing him, I can hear her laughing.

 **[Private] – [Peebee]@[Vetra]:** So When are you going to tell Sara about your crush?

 **[Private] – [Vetra]@[Peebee]:** How did you? Never mind, I don’t know if there will be a right time.

 **[Peebee]:** Sara, Vetra wants to snog you! :D

 

 **[Peebee]** signed out.

 

 **[Jaal]:** It appears it is not just a tradition between siblings.

 **[Scott]:** Sara has gone all silent.

 **[Sara]:** Scott... Double Date?

 **[Gil]:** FINALLY!!!!

 **[Suvi]:** Can I be the maid of honour! I can wear a beautiful dress!

 **[Suvi]:** Of course, not as nice as yours though Sara.

 **[Sara]:** It’s just a date.

 **[Gil]:** You already have a date? Where’s my invite?

 **[Scott]:** So when am I walking you down the aisle?

 **[Sara]:** I hate you all...

 

 **[Sara]** signed out.

 

 **[Scott]:** I think she forgot that she locked herself in the Nomad and we are all outside it.

 **[Vetra]:** Sara would look nice in a wedding dress.

 **[Scott]:** OMG that squeal was amazing!

 **[Gil]:** She’s bright red. She’s like a Pathfinder tomato!

 

 **[Lexi]** signed in.

 

 **[Lexi]:** Scott I can see from the cameras that Gil is on top of the Nomad, should he fall please ensure he is brought to the Medbay.

 **[Scott]:** Yes Boss!

 **[Suvi]:** I wonder what food they will have at the reception.

 **[Gil]:** Don’t worry, I’ll make sure they have plenty of rocks for my girl!

 **Suvi]:** I am never going to live that down...

 

 


	7. Voices.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SAM has an idea. It backfires.

**Tempest Communication Network** Offline...

 **[SAM]** installed **Dictation Software**.

 **[SAM]** installed **Text-Speech Interface**.

 **Tempest Communication Network** updating...

 **Translation Matrix** updated.

 **Tempest Communication Network** Online...

**[Automated Message]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network. Please use responsibly.

 

 **[SAM]:** All users should now be able to post to the **[Tempest Communication Network]** using the standard communication software within his or her Omni-tool. Speaking to your Omni-tool while using the dictation/recording feature will cause the relevant programs to process your words and post them as text.

 

 **[Peebee]** signed in.

 

 **[Peebee]:** Cool!

 **[Peebee]:** Testing.

 **[Peebee]:** Testing, one, two, three.

 **[Peebee]:** Hey, this actually works quiet wheel.

 **[Peebee]:** Maybe I spoke too spoon.

 

 **[Scott]** signed in.

 

 **[Scott]:** What’s this about spoons?

 **[Peebee]:** Trying to use the new speech thingy

 **[Scott]:** Poor Peebs, It doesn’t understand you.

 **[SAM]:** Please keep any speech clear and concise in order for the programs to work at full efficiency.

 **[Scott]:** In all honesty, I am surprised anyone is awake apart from Gil and me. Sara fell asleep about an hour ago, much to Gils annoyance.

 **[Peebee]:** RemTech doesn’t sleep!

 **[Scott]:** Perhaps we should stop messaging. Saras Omni is still connected to the chat, its beeping with each post.

 **[SAM]:** I have muted the notification alert however; the speaker remains active.

 **[Scott]:** SAM. Why did the screen just flicker?

 **[SAM]:** It appears that Peebee is attempting to install third party software.

 **[Scott]:** This cannot be good.

 **[Peebee]:** :D

 **[Scott]:** Uh-ho!

 

 **[Gil]** signed in.

 

 **[Gil]:** What are you up to Blueberry?

 **[Peebee]:** !Airhorn

 **[Scott]:** Damn

 **[Gil]:** Wow that’s loud.

 **[Peebee]:** !Airhorn

 **[Scott]:** Jeez stop it, that is so loud!

 

 **[Sara]** is no longer idle.

 

 **[Sara]:** What the hell is that?

 **[SAM]:** It would appear Peebee found and installed an airhorn program. This program will play the sound of a vuvuzela when the command is posted. It would seem that the voice chat did warrant some unpredicted issues.

 **[Sara]:** I was sleeping!

 **[Peebee]:** Which is why it was fun :D

 **[Peebee]:**!Airhorn.

 **[Sara]:** Peebee stop it!

 **[Peebee]:** Make me :P

 **[Scott]:** You are so going to regret saying that.

 **[Peebee]:** Well she has to find me first.

 **[SAM]:** Pelessaria is in the ventilation duck behind the kitchen wall.

 **[Sara]:** Thank you SAM

 **[SAM]:** Or perhaps she is aboard the Nexus in her old apartment. One can never remember.

 **[Peebee]:** Hehe!  :D

 **[Sara]:** SAM...

 **[SAM]:** !Airhorn

 **[Sara]:** Worst. AI. EVER!

 

 **[Sara]** signed out.

 

 **[SAM]:** Perhaps my connection to Sara is having adverse effects. I seem to be drawn more to teasing and humour that an AI should.

 **[Peebee]:** You’re the best AI SAM, don’t ever change.

 **[Scott]:** I agree. But maybe get rid of the airhorn.

 **[Gil]:** Deffo **.**

 **[Peebee]:** :(


	8. Matchmaker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peebee strikes again.

**Tempest Communication Network** Online...

**[Automated Message]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network. Please use responsibly.

 

 **[Vetra]:** So then, Sid just decided not to do what she was told and ended up setting fire to his boots.

 **[Gil]:** Damn, Sid sounds fun we should get her in the crew! I always wanted an assistant.

 **[Scott]:** I thought that was me? :o

 **[Gil]:** Nope, you are Pathfinder 1.5, and of course my eye candy.

 **[Private] – [Peebee]@[Scott]:** Hey do you know, when Sara and V’s date is?

 **[Private] – [Scott]@[Peebee]:** No Idea, They were supposed to join me and Gil last week but Sara was trapped on Eos with Liam for one of his silly schemes.

 **[Private] – [Peebee]@[Scott]:** k, cya. o/

 **[Scott]:** Reminds me, SAM can you update my privileges since I’m taking over from Sara for the next few weeks.

 **[SAM]:** Of course, Scott.

 **[Sara]:** Oh you will soon share my hate of the Archon dear brother.

 **[Scott]:** To be fair you hate many things, I might find him cute and cuddly, like your old kitten Captain Mittens.

 **[Sara]:** Silence! That cat was evil!!!

 **[Scott]:** Well yeah I suppose it was, but still cute though.

 **[Sara]:** Well I don’t think it realised that a cat is a humans pet and not the other way around.

 **[Scott]:** Is that because he used to bring you dead mice all the time and drop them in your lap.

 **[Sara]:** Like I said evil.

 **[Scott]:** It was a cat gift. ^_^

 **[Suvi]:** :D

 **[Sara]:** What would I want with a dead mouse?

 **[Sara]:** Wait did you teach him!

 **[Scott]:** Maybe...

 **[Sara]:** I hate you.

 **[Vetra]:**  You two can be so funny.

 **[Peebee]:** V & S you free tomorrow, I was thinking about that new cafe opening on the Nexus.

 **[Sara]:** I have no plans.

 **[Peebee]:** V?

 **[Vetra]:** Yes, I suppose.

 **[Peebee]:** Good, because I’m not, you two go ahead without me. Enjoy your date!! :D

 

 **[Peebee]** signed out.

 

 **[Sara]:** Did she just?

**[Gil]: Ha!**

**[Scott]:**   Hey Gil, Want to go with them and have that double date?

 **[Gil]:** Sounds like a plan.

 **[Vetra]:** Wait, we never agreed.

 **[Suvi]:** Yes you did. It is in writing above my post. :)

 **[Sara]:** What the hell, sounds like fun. Thanks Bumbles.

 **[Gil]:** Why didn’t I think of that? Bumble bee! xD

 **[Sara]:** Thanks, I am here all night.

 **[Vetra]:** I hope so.

 **[Gil]:** xD

 **[Sara]:** :o

 **[Vetra]:** Oh crap, I left dictation on...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would anybody like me to write out the date?
> 
> As always, Thanks for reading and prompts/ideas are welcome.


	9. Interest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peebee causes trouble yet again.

**Tempest Communication Network** Online...

**[Automated Message]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network. Please use responsibly.

 

 **[Sara]:** Yeah, the date was nice. It was perfect, Vetra made such a good choice.

 **[Vetra]:** Ryder...

 **[Sara]:** You’re blushing aren’t you?

 **[Scott]:** Gil, please tell me we are that cute as a couple.

 

**[Peebee] signed in.**

 

 **[Peebee]:** .... yeah I can see what you mean. Must be hard.

 

 **[Cora]** **signed in.**

 

 **[Cora]:** Yeah, it is especially since he’s taken.

 **[Gil]:** What’s this about?

 **[Peebee]:** You should come clean about it; Sara understood when I told her how I feel.

 **[Sara]:** Look at the grammar, it’s the dictation software.

 **[Cora]:** I guess you are right, but it’s also disconcerting, he just looks so much like Alec.

 **[Scott]:** Oh god...

 **[Peebee]:** Trust me, Scott will understand, after all they are alike, don’t you think?

 **[Sara]:** Scott, you ladies man!

 **[Cora]:** I suppose you are right. Sara is more hot-headed than Scott so I should be okay.

 **[Sara]:** Am not!

 **[Gil]:** You are.

 **[Scott]:** Sorry Sis its true.

 **[Peebee]:** So how would you tell him?

 **[Vetra]:** You are kind of hot-headed Sara.

 **[Sara]:** Betrayal Thy Name is LOVE!! *heartbroken*

 **[Scott]:** Ha!

 **[Cora]:** I would prefer to do it in private; it would be okay if Sara were there I guess with them being family.

 **[Scott]:** Do you think Cora knows she’s been recorded.

 **[Peebee]:** No.

[ **Cora]:** No?

 **[Peebee]:** Oh sorry, weird messages, that’s probably best.

 **[Cora]:** Weird messages?

 **[Scott]:** Here we go...

 **[Gil]:** Is this how Peebee dies?

 **[Cora]:** How am I logged in?

 **[Cora]:** Peebee get back here, you are so dead!

 **[Gil]:** So, to answer your question Scott, Yes, I think we are that cute.

 **[SAM]:** Scott, Peebee is trying to open the airlock to the Tempest. She appears to be running from Cora.

 **[Peebee]:** LET ME IN!

 **[Scott]:** Open the airlock SAM.

 **[Peebee]:** Lock It, Lock it, Lock it!

 **[Cora]:** Don’t you dare Ryder.

 **[Peebee]:** **THAT HURTS, STOP IT! Ow!**

 **[SAM]:** This conversation has inspired me to update the Network. I shall implement overnight.

 **[Sara]:** What would that be SAM?

 **[SAM]:** That Sara, is my secret.


	10. Checks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SAM has news and Peebee has a secret.

**Tempest Communication Network** Online...

**[Automated Message]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network. Please use responsibly.

 **[SAM]:** Nexus Security have been authorised to do a full systems check. This will also involve details of use of Nexus Net and therefore the contents of this chat. I will be processing an algorithm that will hide unwanted details from them. This will most likely cover every chat log created in this chat.

 **[SAM]:** You may wish to purge your browsing histories however.

**[Peebee]** signed in.

 

 **[Peebee]:** What the hell, SAM!

 **[Peebee]:** Need to wipe ASAP!

 

 **[Gil]** signed in

 

 **[Gil]:** So Peebee. what you hiding? Nudes of Tiny?

 **[Peebee]:** Something like that!

 

 **[Vetra]** signed in.

 

 **[Vetra]:** You have what!

 **[Peebee]:** I may have edited her face onto several models. I am not sorry!

 **[Vetra]:** Oh you have me wrong. I want copies!

 **[Peebee]:** Really?

**[Vetra]: NO! I WILL FIND YOU AND HURT YOU!**

**[SAM]:** Peebee is located on the Hyperion near SAM Node.

 **[Peebee]:** SAM, you traitor!

 **[SAM]:** You are interfering with my operations. If Vetra can remove you and prevent you further distracting me I may be assist with the purge.

 **[Peebee]:** Okay nobody disturb SAM!

 **[Peebee]:** Oh shit. How did you get here so fast?  Wait. Oh.

 **[Vetra]:** Out. Now!

 

 **[Sara]** signed in.

 

 **[Sara]:** Why would you edit may face onto things? O_O

 **[Peebee]:** You know, for  personal time?

 **[Vetra]:** Okay thats it!

 **[Gil]:** Sara record this now.

**[Peebee]: Help!**

**[Vetra]:** Get back here Racoon!

 **[Peebee]:** I am not a.. ***choking noises***

 **[Gil]:** Lol, so thats the update. Dictation picks up sounds now too! Awesome SAM!

 **[Sara]:** V, maybe you should let her go, she’s nearly the same colour as her jacket.

 **[Vetra]:** Delete them!

 **[Peebee]:** ***deep breathes*** Hate ***deep breathes*** You.


	11. Munchies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sara gets the munchies and Peebee... well. She is Peebee.

**Tempest Communication Network** Online…

 

 **[Automated Message]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network. Please use responsibly.

 

 

 **[Sara]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Sara]:** Anyone want anything from the shop?

 **[Scott]:** Sara it’s two in the morning, why would you be at the shops?

 **[Sara]:** I had the munchies, so I decided it was snack time.

 **[Sara]:** So, do you want anything or not?

 

 

 **[Peebee]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Peebee]:** Who ate the last banana?

 **[Scott]:** Not me I only eat them for under doctor’s orders.

 **[Peebee]:** What? Why?

 

 

 **[Lexi]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Lexi]:** Bananas are a good source of potassium.

 **[Peebee]:** Okay, but who ate the last banana? It was mine!

 **[Sara]:** Peebs it was only a banana.

 **[Peebee]:** Do you have any idea how hard it is to get hold of most fruit!

 **[Scott]:** Not that hard. SAM can get more later from the Hyperion.

 **[SAM]:** I had already ordered replacements. They should arrive tomorrow.

 **[Sara]:** See, now does anybody want anything from the shop?

**[Peebee]: @[All Users] WHO ATE THE LAST BANANA!**

**[Scott]:** Peebee!

 **[Sara]:** Okay… now I’m glad I was awake already, especially after last time.

**[Peebee]: @[All Users] WHO ATE THE LAST BANANA!**

**[Lexi]:** Would you stop?

 **[Scott]:** Seriously Peebee, stop it! That sends everyone a notification!

 **[Peebee]:** That’s the point! Someone stole and ate my banana!

 

 

 **[Vetra]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Vetra]:** Who the hell cares about a piece of fruit! It’s the middle of the night!

 **[Peebee]:** Me! It was mine! **@[All Users]** Where is my banana!

 **[Sara]:** V, you want anything from the shop?  <3

 **[Vetra]:** A grenade or a sharp stabbing implement.

 

 

 **[Gil]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Gil]:** My one night off in a week and you choose now of all times to rage. Over a bloody banana of all things!

 

 

 **[Suvi]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Suvi]:** I ate the last apple but the banana was still there at that point. Can I go back to sleep now?

 

 

 **[Suvi]** signed out.

 

 

 **[Peebee]:** Nobody sleeps until I get my answers! **@[All Users].**

 

 

 **[Suvi]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Suvi]:** Stop It!

 **[Peebee]:** No!

 

 

 **[Jaal]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Jaal]:** A banana is the long yellow fruit, yes?

 **[Peebee]:** Yes!

 **[Jaal]:** In that case it was me. It was unmarked, so I assumed it was unclaimed.

 **[Peebee]:** Mean creature!

 **[Jaal]:** Rambunctious imbecile.

 **[Peebee]:** Banana bandit!

 **[Jaal]:** Insufferable adolescent.

 **[Peebee]:** I’m older than you!

 **[Jaal]:** Not in maturity, clearly.

 **[Sara]:** Burned!

 **[Peebee]:** At least I’m a cool colour! Why would a man be pink!

 **[Scott]:** I like pink.

 **[Peebee]:** Shut up!

 

 

 **[Cora]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Cora]:** How about you shut up! And no Sara I don’t need anything.

 

 

 **[Cora]** signed out.

 

 

 **[Sara]:** Back and I bring candy!

 **[Vetra]:** Dextro too?

 **[Sara]:** Of course! <3

 **[Vetra]:** Best Girlfriend ever!

 **[Gil]:** You two are so adorable at times.

 **[Peebee]:** What about my banana! **@[All Users].**

 

 

 **[Kallo]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Kallo]:** No one cares!

 

 

 **[Peebee]** disconnected.

 

 

 **[Scott]:** That’s new, and what was that noise?

 **[Kallo]:** I disconnected all networking to the escape pod and that was the sound of the override clamps sealing it shut. Good Night!

 

**[Kallo]** signed out.

 

 

 **[Gil]:** Kallo, I know we don’t agree on a lot of things but I could kiss you right now!


	12. Jumpers.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sara has a secret. Cora has a crush. The whole thing goes crazy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder: Since SAM installed Dictation software most of the crew use that.

**Tempest Communication Network** Online…

 

 **[Automated Message]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network. Please use responsibly.

 

 

 **[Kallo]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Kallo]:** I just realised in the Milky Way it’s nearly the end of November.

 

 

 **[Scott]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Scott]:** Oh no…

 

 

 **[Cora]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Cora]:** I am confused.

 

 

 **[Gil]** signed in.

 

 **[Suvi]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Gil]:** What???

 **[Suvi]:** I sense something bad.

 

 

 **[Liam]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Liam]:** Oh no… I remember what you said!

 

 **[Sara]** signed in.

 

 

**[Sara]: ITS NEARLY CHRISTMAS!**

**[Scott]:** Please no! No more jumpers!

 **[Cora]:** Jumpers?

 **[Scott]:** Sis… you can make jumpers, but please don’t go overboard like usual… remember Christmas happens every year.

 **[Cora]:** Wait Sara knits jumpers for Christmas?

 **[Sara]:** Yeah! What colour do you want?

 **[Cora]:** Green. Sorry Scott, but my crush just transferred to your sister.

 **[Liam]:** Wait you have a crush on Sara because now you know she can knit?

 **[Cora]:** I happen to appreciate and love homemade knitwear.

 **[Scott]:** Is this real life?

 **[Liam]:** Is this just fantasy?

 **[Sara]:** Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality ^_^

 **[Suvi]:** Open your eyes, look up to the skies and see.

 **[Cora]:** Oh for the love of….

 **[Liam]:** **Nooooooo!**

 **[Gil]:** Wait we can save it!

 **[Gil]:** What is love?

 **[Scott]:** Baby don’t hurt me.

 **[Sara]:** Don’t hurt me.

 **[Cora]:** No more!

 **[Suvi]:** Baby, don’t hurt me.

 **[Cora]:** No I literally meant no more… I hate Haddaway!

 **[Sara]:** Aww okay… well I’m going to start making jumpers later, so…

 **[Sara]:** Tonight’s gonna be a good night.

 **[Scott]:** Tonight’s the night.

 **[Liam]:** Let’s live it up

 **[Gil]:** I got my money.

 **[Suvi]:** Let’ spend it up, like

 **[Cora]:** Oh my god!

 

 

 **[Cora]** signed out.

 

 

 **[Liam]:** ***laughing*** Jump out that sofa

 **[Sara]:** Let’ kick it off! ***laughing***

 

 

 **[Vetra]** signed in.

 

 

 **[Vetra]:** Sara you have a lovely singing voice.

 **[Sara]:** I… oh… uh…. T-t-thanks!

 **[Scott]:** Awww Sis, stammering from a compliment off a pretty girl.

 **[Liam]:** ***chuckles*** I kissed a girl and I liked it

 **[Gil]:** The taste of her cherry chapstick

 **[Scott]:** ***laughing*** Oh my god, I’m dying!

**[Various Users]: *Hysterical laughter***


	13. Lightweight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sara appears to be lightweight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder: Since SAM installed Dictation software most of the crew use that.

**Tempest Communication Network** Online **...**

**[Automated Message]:** Welcome to the Tempest Communication Network. Please use responsibly.

**[Vetra]** signed in.

 

**[Vetra]: DRACK!**

 

 **[Drack]** signed in.

 

 **[Drack]:** What?

 **[Vetra]:** You got Sara into a bar fight?

 

 **[Scott]** signed in.

 

 **[Scott]:** My sister in a bar fight? No way!

 

 **[Sara]** signed in.

 

 **[Sara]:** Why is that so hard to believe?

 **[Drack]:** Technically, she got me into a bar fight.

 **[Vetra]:** Why did I even agree to this after what happened on Kadara.

 **[Scott]:** Drack? I’m sensing a story here.

 **[Sara]:** Please Drack, don’t say anything!

 **[Scott]:** OMG! Its clear to me now, you got her drunk! :D

 **[Sara]:** :(

 **[Drack]:** I didn’t even have to try, she’s a lightweight.

 

 **[Jaal]** signed in.

 

 **[Jaal]:** She is rather light.

 

 **[Suvi]** signed in.

 

 **[Suvi]:** They didn’t mean actual weight Jaal.

 

 **[Gil]** signed in.

 

 **[Gil]:** Two questions, Lightweight by Human or Krogan standards?

 **[Drack]:** Krogan obviously.

 **[Gil]:** That explains a lot.

 **[Scott]:** Not really, Sara can’t hold her alcohol.

 **[Sara]:** Hey, why are you so mean to me all the time?

 **[Scott]:** I’m your brother… it’s my job.

 **[Sara]:** Oh yeah…

 **[Gil]:** Anyway!

 **[Gil]:** Second question, Jaal, how do you know how light Sara is?

 **[Jaal]:** I believe it is called a piggy back ride.

 **[Sara]:** :D

 **[Gil]:** You gave her a piggy back ride?

 **[Jaal]:** I wanted to test my strength, Sara was happy to accommodate.

 **[Sara]:** It was fun!

 

 **[Peebee]** signed in.

 

**[Peebee]:[[Nexus_Archive_Earth_Animals_Z044568]](https://d3i6fh83elv35t.cloudfront.net/newshour/app/uploads/2017/01/pig_AdobeStock_2747487-1024x683.jpeg)**

**[Peebee]:** You are the right color!

**[Jaal]:[[Nexus_Archive_Earth_Animals_X112578]](https://img.purch.com/w/660/aHR0cDovL3d3dy5saXZlc2NpZW5jZS5jb20vaW1hZ2VzL2kvMDAwLzAwOC8wMzQvb3JpZ2luYWwvY3V0ZS1yYWNjb29uLTEwMDkxNS0wMi5qcGc=)**

**[Gil]:** Ha! Jaal gets it.

**[Peebee]: …**

**[Vetra]:** This isn’t over Drack.

 **[Drack]:** Shame, I was planning to take her out again tonight.

**[Vetra]: …**

**[Drack]:** What? Nothing like a good bar fight to get the blood pumping.

**[Vetra]: …**

**[Scott]:** Sounds fun, can I come?

 **[Vetra]:** Yes, take Scott and leave Sara with me.

 **[Sara]:** But V I wanna go!

 **[Vetra]:** Really?

 **[Sara]:** Yeah!

 **[Vetra]:** _Really?_

 **[Sara]:** Yea…. Ohhhhhhh!

 **[Sara]:** Have fun Scott!

 

 **[Sara]** signed out.

 **[Vetra]** signed out.

 

 **[Gil]:** Ah, young love.

 **[Peebee]:** Think they will let me watch?

 

 **[Vetra]** signed in.

 

 **[Vetra]:** No!

 **[Vetra]:** V put the omni away… ***kissing noises*** Its distrac…

 

 **[Vetra]** signed out.

 

 **[Gil]:** Damn Sara works fast, must run in the family.

 **[SAM]:** Sara appears to be working at optimal levels, no increase in speed detected.

 **[Gil]:** We need to have a talk SAM…


End file.
